Never Go Back

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General information

Written by: A. Lee, T. Balsamo, T. McCord and W. Hunt

Never Go Back is the eleventh track from Evanescence's third studio album, Evanescence. The working title for it was "Orange". Amy revealed the official title of the song in an MTV interview.

In the same interview, Amy said:

It wasn't about my life so much. ... When we first got into pre-production, the earthquakes and tsunami happened in Japan, and we were all just totally glued to paying attention to it, all these incredibly heartbreaking images, and we just [thought], 'Wow.' And I was thinking about it a lot. It was consuming my mind, and we were working on that song at the same time. I was kind of working on lyrics at night; we'd practice all day, and I'd go home at night and be working on lyrics by myself. And I came in the next day and was like, 'Guys, I'm going to make this song about the tsunami.'

In an earlier interview, Amy said this about the song:

There's this beautiful song that — it's definitely going to make the album, or I will kill someone — it's not like a single or anything, it's just this epic album track that's about loss from the perspective of someone losing someone in a tragedy, and it's really cool to listen back to that, too.

In a track-by-track interview with NME.com, Amy added:

"Never Go Back" was actually inspired by the earthquakes and tsunami in Japan. While we were writing a bunch of music at pre-production that was going on. And I just remember, you know, we were just watching the news and looking at all these pictures on the internet, and just like... I was just inspired and feeling a lot of feelings, just of empathy and sympathy, and just sort of like 'wow, what would that be like'... you know. Putting myself in the situation in my head. Sort of accidently I guess, when I do the thing where I go home and do my homework, and work on the lyrics. I just sort of was writing without thinking about why and after a minute I was like 'oh okay, I'm thinking about Japan, and I'm singing about Japan'. Like, why not just let this song be that story. So, it's about losing everything, you know, and about life beyond your control.

The second verse had the lyric "I will find you by the beat of your heart" before Amy changed it to "I can feel you in my heart, just show me the way."

The song was performed live for the first time on October 6, 2011 at the Coliseo José Miguel Agrelot in San Juan, Puerto Rico. Watch a video of the performance here.

Never Go Back was confirmed to be reworked and included on the orchestral album, Synthesis, when the track list was revealed through the album's pre-order on September 15, 2017. This version was performed live for the first time on October 14, 2017 at the Pearl Concert Theater in Las Vegas, Nevada for the Synthesis Live tour. Watch a video of the performance here.

This is what Evanescence posted about Never Go Back in a Synthesis track-by-track on Facebook;

We were writing the song as the 2011 earthquake and tsunami was hitting Tohoku, Japan. We needed some lyrics for a very dramatic, very heavy-sounding song. Watching those images on the news, we had this empathy, so those feelings just came out of me, wondering what I would feel like in that position. The reason it’s on this album is because of its nature. That bridge piano part is one of the most dramatic classical elements in our music, and I always visualized it as a piece. To take it, accentuate it, and go all the way with that idea was really satisfying. We took that piano bridge part and used it as the intro to this new version, then allowed the orchestra to really take over, just as I always heard it in my head. It wasn’t supposed to be the first song on the album, but I realized using that one piano note was the simplest place to start. It gave the album so much room to grow, sonically and musically. And the vocal, singing from a dark place, leading to the light, was exactly the right way to start. That was a last-minute choice, instead of what we’d planned originally, using the Unraveling intro into Imaginary.

The song was ripped off by Bring Me the Horizon on their 2019 song nihilist blues, and the writing credits were offered to Evanescence after both bands got in touch.

Versions

Studio Versions

Never Go Back [Evanescence version]

• Recording Date: April 2011 - July 2011
• Status: Released
• Released On: Evanescence (track #11)
• Length: 4:27

Never Go Back [Synthesis version]

• Recording Date: February - August 2017
• Status: Released
• Released On: Synthesis (track #2)
• Length: 4:50

Live Versions

Never Go Back [Live]

• Performing period: October 6, 2011 - November 9, 2012; November 2015; April 30 - May 2, 2016
• Example: Coliseo José Miguel Agrelot, San Juan, Puerto Rico (October 6, 2011)

Never Go Back [Synthesis Live]

• Performing period: October 14, 2017 - September 8, 2018
• Status: Released
• Recording date: November 3, 2017
• Released on: Synthesis Live (track #2)
• Length: 6:03

Lyrics

Everything is so dark
And I know there's something wrong
But I can't turn the light on
In that split second change
When you knew we couldn't hold on
I realized I live to love you

Save yourself
Don’t look back
Tearing us apart until it's all gone
The only world I've ever known
Sleeps beneath the waves
What I remember

I won't give up on you
I can feel you in my heart
Just show me the way
I don't belong here alone
I can still see your face
Where it's burned into my mind
I die every time I close my eyes
You're always there

Save yourself
Don’t look back
Tearing us apart until it's all gone
The only world I've ever known
Sleeps beneath the waves
But I'm the one who’s drowning
Without your love I am lost
And I can never go back home

All across the ocean
We are calling, calling
Are, are, are you there?
Nothing left for me 'til I find you

Because it's all gone
The only one world ever known
Sleeps beneath the waves
But I'm the one who’s drowning
Without your love I am lost
And I can never go back
I can never go back home